In September of this year, it will officially mark two years since I moved to the United States, specifically to Denver, Colorado. And although I still feel like those rocks in the construction pit before building a solid foundation, I’m talking about rocks first because my foundation is seeking to be built in the most optimal way possible. This time, I’m building it with my own hands, grateful for past, present, and future help, but in this construction, I am moving entirely at my own pace and rhythm. At the beginning of August, I realized that my thoughts one of those mornings were in English, and as soon as I observed it consciously, in the middle of those two dualities, I smiled with happiness because I am making the reality of speaking two languages simultaneously come true. And although my sensations in English lack depth due to how new it is in my system since I have been speaking it only since I moved to the United States, every day I feel that I am progressing a little more, gradually organizing it grammatically, in pronunciation, and in my brain’s listening comprehension. But one thing is clear: my brain no longer seeks to translate every conversation from English to Spanish; it is beginning to feel like I understand and respond from a natural understanding in just one language. I am grateful for that.

In my search for balance within the system in which I experience my life, I try to make these spaces for myself to breathe and remind myself that my whole self is unlimited and eternal, and that any navigation through different creative processes seeking materialization is for the main purpose of being expressed and experienced. It is there that I return to myself and keep moving forward.

Elizabeth Gilbert says in one of her books, «When you go out into the world to help yourself, you end up wanting to help everyone,» and although economically and in terms of influence I don’t feel at that point right now, I believe it’s always good to start somehow. It’s in those ways that I’ve started every time I’m honest with others and whenever I can be useful in something to help when it’s needed and within my reach to do so. I think that by helping others, you also help yourself because, in some way, you are helping another human being who, although they are the one needing your help at that moment, you have been or could be in that position where you need help from another human being. Making this conscious is realizing the need to form communities that support and help each other, regardless of the number of members or their physical proximity; it is an act of humanity’s heart.

The weekend before this one, I was invited to a farewell party with good wishes for a woman from Colombia whom I met in December of last year. This person was here in the United States on a «cultural» exchange with a program better known as au pair, a French term where a young person can make an exchange from a foreign country to take care of a family’s children and perform some household chores in exchange for a weekly allowance, cultural immersion, and the opportunity to learn the language of the country they temporarily move to. In essence, this is based on a shared cultural exchange experience, a program that can last between six months and two years, depending on the agreement reached between the host family and the au pair.

In the United States, there is a very high demand for many families to join these programs since childcare costs are high, and these families can save a lot of money. And I think that’s the problem: many of these families, in their ignorance and insensitivity, use these programs to exploit these young women, who are also academically prepared, and whose intention in trusting their lives to these new families is merely the youthful illusion of a cultural exchange. They leave their families, their language, and everything they know up to that moment for a promise that, unfortunately, not all these families fulfill. I find it outrageous that the United States, which promotes respect for human rights, allows all these irregularities in how these families treat these young women. I want to clarify that not all families treat these young women unfairly, but many do. I believe it is crucial that the relevant entities pay attention to this so that they can promote fair treatment for these young women and not turn a blind eye to a form of modern slavery. Because whether it’s six months or two years, these young women deserve respect, care, and the opportunity to have this fair cultural exchange. Many of them not only take extraordinary care of these children; many of them also teach the language of their country of origin and provide this high level of care to these families’ children, which is invaluable. Many of these young women have aspirations, are academically prepared, speak multiple languages, have families they miss and who miss them, and I find it so unfair what they are paid weekly in comparison to the mathematical formula, because childcare is an important job, just like any other, and deserves to be recognized as such.

The Sunday following that Saturday’s party with my acquaintance and her friends, I had the opportunity to eat a variety of food from different countries, and all the people there wished this beautiful Colombian woman the best of luck in her new adventure. On Sunday, we had another dinner, and as we walked through the streets of downtown, I could see this unity in all of them, and although they all share that au pair experience in which they are currently involved, and I do not, I felt happy for all of them that they have each other. I could feel the summer air, the sunset in its different shades, the sounds of the city, the smiles, and a shared uncertainty, in which I also include myself, where it feels so grand to be alone in a new country. But every time I feel that way, I remind myself that if I am human and so are others, then wherever I go, I am not physically alone because I am accompanied by all of them, and it is always my desire to connect with good and genuine people.

If you are reading this and are a member of one of these host families and are still unaware of the true meaning, hurry to inform yourself so that you can respectfully understand the ways and processes, and above all, be grateful to welcome these people into your home who, just like you and your wishes for your children and loved ones, have dreams and aspirations. If you are a participant in the au pair program, make sure you are well-informed before accepting any contract, thoroughly investigate all the pros and cons, seek advice on how to transfer to another family if, after the trial period, you don’t feel safe and respected, and always strive to make the intention of having this cultural exchange a reality, and of course, fulfill your part fairly, finding a balance where both parties experience the true intention of the program. And to the companies that are intermediaries in these programs and profit financially from them, seek to be human first in your processes and practices before putting money first. All human beings, regardless of their position, influence, education, etc., have the power to, together, make this world a better place.

Written by Kafme